


It's the Funny Things in Life

by InTheShadows



Series: Tony Stark Bingo (Round 3) 2020 Fills [6]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Clint Barton & Tony Stark Friendship, Clint Barton Is a Good Bro, Clint Barton is a Little Shit, Don't copy to another site, Gen, Humor as a coping mechanism, Random & Short, Tony Stark being Tony Stark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:55:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24974197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InTheShadows/pseuds/InTheShadows
Summary: Whoever said Clint is the life of the party was lying. Either that or they are delusional. The only person who thinks Clint is funny is Clint himself. That doesn't mean Tony can't appreciate him anyways. Bros have to stick together at all, bad jokes or no. And Tony can definitely use a bro with who he is sharing a Tower with. (Even if said bro is sometimes part of the problem.)Let the meeting of People Who Got Screwed Over By Those Who Were Brainwashed/Tortured Into Compliance (new name pending) begin.
Relationships: Clint Barton & Tony Stark
Series: Tony Stark Bingo (Round 3) 2020 Fills [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2066145
Comments: 3
Kudos: 73
Collections: Tony Stark Bingo 2020





	It's the Funny Things in Life

**Author's Note:**

> Title: It's the Funny Things in Life  
> Collaborator Name: InTheShadows  
> Card Number: 3102  
> Link:[HERE](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24974197)  
> Square Filled: S5/ mind control or brainwashing  
> Ship/Main Pairing: Gen (Clint & Tony)  
> Rating: T  
> Major Tags: attempt at humor(by author), randomness, humor as a coping mechanism (by characters)  
> Summary:  
> Word Count: 1243

“What’s up bitches?” Clint asks as he collapses onto the couch, “I’m here now. The party can begin.” 

Tony, as the only other person in the room, snorts. “Since when did  _ you _ become the life of the party birdbrain?” 

“Screw you Stark. I am awesome and you know it. You should feel privileged that I allow you to bask in my glorious presence at all.” He sinks further into his seat. 

Awesome. Right. Is that what they’re calling it now? “What happened? Your other super secret club members finally get wise and kick you out?” 

Clint flips him off. “Nah. Nat, Loki and Bucky decided to play poker. Normally I’m all for watching the slaughter, but those three are out for blood today. Going to turn into a bloodbath and I had no intentions on being the loser. Lady Luck was not with me today so I got out while I could.” 

“You do mean a figurative bloodbath right?” He would love to say he is only asking as a joke, but he isn't. Unfortunately he has learned the hard way that sometimes bloodbath is all too literal. Why does he live with these people again? His life was never like this before. 

“Eh,” Clint sways his hand side to side. 

Great. “JARVIS tell those three that if they stain anything  _ again _ I am going to take it out of their hides.” Seriously. It’s like living in a frat house some days. 

“Of course Sir. I will relay that right away,” JARVIS response before continuing, “Prince Liesmith would like you to know that as a superior god with superior powers who grew up in a warrior society he is more than capable of handling a few mere blood stains.” 

Or maybe toddlers. Egotistical toddlers. Especially that one. He can choke on that ego, which is really saying something right there. Royalty. Please. “Oh yeah, then what happened to the last couch, hmmm?” 

“And I quote, ‘That was merely to piss you off Stark.’”

Well then, mission accomplished. “Fuck you too Lokes.” 

Beside him Clint snickers, not even bothering to try to hide it. 

“Same to you Barton. Don’t think that I’ve forgotten that you were in on that one too.” 

Clint grins at him unrepentantly, like butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth. “Team bonding exercise.” 

Tony rolls his eyes so hard that it almost hurts. “Right. Like I am going to believe that bull that Steve tried to give me. If you’re going to try then at least make it believable. Or funny. I’m flexible, I will accept funny too. 

“He’s still upset that you won’t let him join the club.” 

Said club - people who got screwed over by those who were brainwashed/tortured into compliance - was made for one single purpose, that being in defense of the other club - those who were brainwashed/tortured into compliance. Yes the names need work. No, no one can agree on a better one. Talk about a bloodbath. 

It started as a joke, naturally. How else does anything start around here? Tony had named it when Loki had been forced onto them by Odin. Oh sure, they were told that it was punishment. A way to repent. That it was meant to teach him respect and the value of life and blah, blah, blah. Honestly Tony thinks that he just didn’t want to deal with the bag of cats and pushed him off onto someone else. 

Clint, as the supposed other member of said club, took the joke as well as one would expect. Apparently not having full agency over your actions doesn’t mean instant forgiveness from people. Who knew right? 

But then Nat got involved, citing the Red Room as qualification. And then Steve found Bucky and brought him and a new bird friend back to the Tower. One thing led to another and here they are. 

“Steve got his own ass dumped out of the helicarrier. It’s not my fault he got himself disqualified.” 

Alright, so maybe it is more than that. Or it started off as more anyways. When Steve told him about the assassination of his parents. Well. Let us say that he did not take it well. Or gracefully. Actually the less said about the whole thing, the better. Logically, sure, Tony knows it wasn’t Bucky’s fault, but logic had no ground at the time. It had been drowned out by the sheer amount of  _ rage _ in him. 

So sure, yes, he let Bucky make the Tower his home and provided for him like everyone else, but that didn’t mean he had to like it. Nor did that mean he wanted to see him. Or Steve. As much as Tony appreciated being told, being up front and honest without trying to hide the information from him, it didn’t make it any easier to deal with him either. Bucky and Steve were too linked together in his mind for that. 

When Clint formed this club in response Tony had not been capable of looking at Steve without wanting to punch him. Deserved or not - and Tony knew which one it was - that is how he felt. By now it is just the principle of the matter. The indignant look on his face every time Tony denies him is too funny. 

Who knows. Maybe this will even teach him not to do shit like jump out of a plane without a parachute. Probably not, but one can always hope. 

“What argument is he up to now anyways?”

Clint hums thoughtfully. “He’s comparing said helicarrier incident and you being thrown out of the window by Loki actually.” 

“Let. Himself. Be. Yeeted. Not the same as being forcibly rejected towards the pavement against my will.”

Clint, like the asshole he is, keeps snickering. “Yeah I think he got tired of trying to appeal to your better half.” 

Finally. He should know by now that Tony doesn’t have one. “What? He got tired of ‘He’s my best friend Tony. They took him from me Tony. He almost  _ killed _ me, Tony, while I was relying on the magical power of friendship to save my dumb ass.’ Guess you can teach an old dog new tricks.” 

“The best part is that Bucky agrees with you too.” 

Tony has mixed feelings about that. He isn’t sure he likes the idea of him and Bucky agreeing on anything. Then again it’s been long enough that he can fully appreciate the sass behind that. Bucky is a sass master - Loki too, come to that - and as soon as Tony gets over his issues - and he will,  _ he will _ , if only out of spite - they are going to have so much fun. 

“And here I thought the best part was when we invited Toucan Sam to join us. For shame Legolas, you’ve been holding out on me.” At first it had been when they let Thor join for the same reasons Steve had been arguing, brother replaced with best friend of course. That had been glorious. But no, his face when he realized that Sam was a part of the club while he still wasn’t was definitely better. A Kodak moment that. 

“I’ll show you video evidence if you build me sticky arrows.” 

Oh the many ways that can and will go wrong. “Deal.” Worth it. 

“Great. Now are you ready to get your butt handed to you in Mario Kart?” 

“Only in your dreams Robin Hood.” 

Let the meeting officially begin. 


End file.
